Thursday, May 11, 2006

The end of the project

My project will be ending tomorrow. The entire assignment went very well as it was planned and the results were as expected, but I yet feel bad since our group of 5 people is going to split up. I feel so attached to them though I was the last one to join the project . We all were getting along great together and worked fine as a team. My present manager is a wonderful lady –an achiever in every sense, a perfect role model and am going to miss her the most. She took immense care of all of us in the team.

Next Monday we all report back to the corporate and will be assigned our new projects. All of us shall go to different places and be part of new teams.

Hopefully we all will meet again, work together, another time for another project.

More people to meet, more things to learn!!

Thursday, April 20, 2006

Unfocussed Kids trying to sound ..............

I hate and loathe it when foolish immatured kids try to sound american with words like wotcha , eh, gonna, wanna, gotcha, jeez and phrase their sentences to sound you know! They are like the end.

These clones bare no responsibility...after all they all belong to the creative line!!! They are different from the know special ones.

Most of these people are working in call centers and are on receiving end of alot of irate calls . Not to forget they make a total fool of themselves also. As people get laid off in call centers all the time. They cant even do such simple tasks.

Now why do they work in call centers ? They work in call centers because their fed-up parents have stopped providing them money. Why cant they get a decent education to get a lucrative job? No they wont...coz they all want to be writers, designers, actors. NO sense of responsibility. They basically want to live of their parents money and blame the whole world that no one understands their arty feelings..creative feelings...basically dumb feelings. They do not want to do anything in life, just sit in front of the mirror if they aspire to become an actress. Click pictures of rejected already worthless things, then call it art--I mean abstract art. Reality is that no one wants to look at them.
Then they want to become designers...their clothes wont be sold on the road side stalls also!! After all even common man has some good taste. And what takes the cake....all want to become stable education....faking their english to sound posh ...and writers...hell..their books wont be taken for free. These days people have no place to keep trash in their houses.

They can sit on their couch , work on their american accents which sounds hopeless anyway, reminds me of Salman-- total fake. His life is a good example for all if 'em' (them).

There can only be a few Arundhati Roys , Shobha Des, Manish Malhotras and Rohit Bals in a huge crowd. Not every tom, dick, harry and harriets can be like them . They are not even a shade of their shadows. Though these days they are there by the dozen.

PS: read my profile, am part of that mission too , registered legal one who enjoys some uses. Now go search . For all the email you sent, it may come to me in the end to take some action. What a coincidence -its a small world. Dont worry will send it back to you as a memoir. What is that...a slap that is not heard hurts more. You and your gang of S--goons and their lovers can do anything, I wont get affected.

Saturday, April 15, 2006

Dowry-a deplorable practice

A few years back on the third day of my post grad class, during introductions we had to say a bit about ourselves & background education. When Vineet’s turn came, he said he was from a business oriented family (something was obvious), our Professor asked "Vineet why do you have to do post grad course, get married, take dowry, be secured easily and enjoy life”. Vineet retorted “Sir, with a graduate degree my value is only in lakhs but with a post grad degree my value will increase to kokhas”.
Yes, this was my classmate who was so blunt, spent 2 years with him in group activities, presentations, research etc. I realized that he was clear with his thoughts & goals.

Dowry is the closely interlinked to many crimes committed against women - ' female infanticide, domestic violence, neglect of the girl child, denial of educational and career opportunities to daughters, rape, extortion, homicide-bride burning, and discrimination' against women to name a few. .

Given the lack of any news about dowry deaths, dowry violence or dowry demands, one would have thought that the problem had disappeared. Far from it. In fact, it has become far more ingrained and taken new forms. Dowry is a symptom of a deeper disease that relates to how our society values women.

Dowry is one of those social practices which no educated Indian would own up with pride, although many still adhere to this much deplorable practice. Dowry continues to be given and taken . Even among the educated sections of society, dowry continues to form an essential part the negotiations that take place in a marriage.

Some of the latest statistics that states that 15000 women have been conned in the state of Punjab alone this year in dowry fraud.

Earlier, families ensured that proper lists and accounts were prepared and the groom's family was made to sign the list of things they received while the dowry itself was put on display for all the relatives to take note of, so there were numerous witnesses to the transaction. Today, for arrant reasons no lists are signed and most of the giving and receiving is veiled in secrecy and made known only between the 2 parties.

This despite the fact that in the last two decades, the anti dowry laws have been made very stringent and draconian. Many interpret the failure of these laws to lessen dowry demanding & torture, as a sign of their poor implementation. Because the conviction rate is too low that results in the culprit going scot free & justice denied to the victim.

Innumerable brides in India are constantly under harassment in their matrimonial homes because their fathers have fallen behind in the payment of endless dowry installments, or the dowry she did bring to her husband is regarded as too meager.
Imagine the plight of a young woman, newly wed into an unfamiliar environment, and surrounded by those she has only just met, who regard her as a means to an end, little more than a device by which to enrich themselves. She knows only too well that a bride may be killed for lack of dowry ... she too must have heard the same stories we've all heard ... but she does not know what to do. She may have overheard her in-laws, even her own husband, talk casually about harassing her, and sometimes contemplate even killing her! The kind of fear that instills in a person is beyond anyones ability to comprehend, its mental torture. It isn't even fear, it is terror.

Domestic violence is on the rise and many of these are caused by inadequate dowry. Brute force is used to establish power relations in the family whereby women are taught and conditioned to accept a slave status because she didn’t fulfill dowry demands . Domestic violence is a way of trying to get women to believe that they can only live at men's mercy & is a burden. It is often committed by men with low self-esteem who destroy a woman's sense of self worth because they feel inadequate to cope with a woman who thinks and acts as a free human being with a mind of her own.
Verbal abuse is also on the rise thus leading to mental torture by undervaluing or devaluing the contribution of household work to the family. Disrespectful speech or behavior towards wife's family for shortcomings in the marriage contract (inability to meet expectations of wedding or post-wedding gifts).
Female foeticide is a direct consequence of dowry .

What I have observed, heard & seen, and is really appalling that domestic violence exists in urban regions as well amongst the educated middle & upper class on a huge scale. The reason it goes unreported or is hushed up because the women are too embarrassed to admit that they are victims of domestic violence .

But does it get them anywhere? Does it better their situation? Why won't she assert her legal rights & make use of it? Why won't the women report the cases to the police when there are adequate laws to take care of it?

If dowry demands are deemed to be NOT satisfied, the groom's family will treat the bride in one of the following ways
Extreme - the bride will be subjected to extreme forms of torture, both physically and emotionally, which may include beating and infliction of physical pain, that may result in her death or permanent physical handicap.
Severe - the bride will be threatened with dismal consequences including divorce and physical abuse, and will have to bear with the insults slung at her parents. Emotional slander can also be cast indirectly by constant fault finding with her inadequacy to meet the expectations of the husband and his family.
Harsh - The bride is reminded of her inadequacies and faced with complaints about her parents. In some cases, pressure is created on her and her parents to meet the demands subsequently.

  • Some ways to help women to take action against & stop dowry harassment is to ensure educational and career opportunities for themselves thus enabling them to become financially independent, strong, assertive & self confident to live a dignified & secured life.
  • Ensure her safety from the discernible threats she is expected to get to take back her case and provide adequate counseling with with an integral support system in place.
  • More helplines/orgs to be formed for women to come forward and report any atrocities inflicted on her.
  • To have more strict anti-dowry laws/domestic laws with stern unyielding consequences that no one should even dare think of dowry. Law should be so fool proof that dowry demander should regret the day he asked for it.

Lately dowry practice seems to have increased alarmingly as some people have their own hidden vested interests....A long way to go till we get rid of this practice to Save Families & Women from this abuse/terror/torture.

Information/statistical data were taken from the following sources:

Sunday, April 09, 2006

Please....No Reservations!!!

When I first heard about reservations way back I was in school then, I hardly paid attention to it and what was explained to me that it was for the upliftment of the some castes. Well well well!!

Fast forward 10years...

Scene 1: I was preparing for CETs and had got all the relevant brochures. Was reading how all the seats are neatly divided amongst all classes. Yet it was all theoretical to me and little did I fathom that practical experience was going to be tough!!

Scene 2: CET results were out on a friday evening, got a good triple digit score and was on cloud nine as was expecting to get into my choice of college.

Scene 3: Monday morning I'm accompanied by my father to go the college for my admissions only to be informed that all general category students are suppose to come after 2 days since as of today only reservation quotas would be filled. I did not understand what the guy was talking or saying.

Slowly when things were falling into place and it dawned to me what the reservations was actually all about. It was the worst day of my life, I felt let down , felt unwanted by my own country , the policies sucked and I was miserable to the core. I felt brain drain was justified.

I managed to get admission in a decent college and complete my course.

All my school life I was taught that we were all equal irrespective of caste, creed and religion. I believed it all along. But on the day of admission I felt discarded, rejected and was treated unequally.

Some observations:
a) All general category students in my class always did well in academics. (of course they too had felt the same as I had during the admission process-it was no secret)
b) By the time we reached our second year, most reserved class students had given up as they had not faired up to the mark . They left the course. What a waste of the precious seat.

The same has been observed by my friends from different professional courses that by the time one moves to higher classes, people who have misused the opportunity and taken the back door entry aren't able to complete the course. Even if they do, its a struggle.

The reason behind reservations doing the rounds for years is to create equal growth opportunities for all irrespective of caste, creed and religion.

Growth does not mean, giving an unmerited admission, it means to raise the level aptitude, which does not seem to happen because they have been given the easier way.

There is already a reservation system in place in IITs, IIMs and colleges for SC & ST. The new proposal is to extend these reservations which will hike the overall reserved seats in these institutions to 50% . It is no coincidence that it just comes before the elections.

If students are denied seats on merit/good marks, thist is the greatest injustice since it will lead to the incredible devaluing of the country’s top institutes because eligible students will be deprived of seats based on merit, and others will be admitted based on their caste, this will greatly dilute the talents in the IITs & IIMs

I definitely feel the poor classes/minorities needs help and support from the government but by proper channels & verifications. If the government is so keen on working for the upliftment of the minority classes, it should provide students from those classes with financial assistance such as scholarships, free education, more schools in smaller cities, tutions, extra classes. But not at the cost of deserving students.

But the unfortunate irony is that the actual poor minorities are not benefiting from this quota system...its the well to do people amongst the SC/ST who are making use of these reservations—which they do not deserve to.

Also the policies should provide help to the SC/ST only in entry levels such as schools ...not throughout the high school and professional courses. In view of the fact that in school they have got the same education/platform as the general category… so why should they again re-use the quota while applying for competitive exams? Why should they use their status once again while applying for government jobs? In every level they have been using these privileges.

Thus our current law not only lets them get a concession to enter, but also gives them life long benefits and allows them to get promoted before others even if they are not as competent or skilled as the other people. Isn't this a case of undue fortification of one section of society?

What kind of incentive system is this, which provides for lifetime assistance/ privileges without asking for people to even work hard for the benefits?

But with time these slots have been misused highly to suit ones advantage (and the actual poor/minorities who may need it never get a chance).

So according to me, a)the financial status /backgound of a candidate should be the criterion of reservation if any, and that too with a proper verification mechanism in place.

b)And such benefits should be given at school entry level only (not in every phase)

The corporate world too has come down heavily on this proposal by saying that there ought to be other methods to provide for the minorities for their growth & development.

IITans have started this online petition to be forwarded to the president opposing the reservation thus stating their protest:

Sunday, April 02, 2006

Spectacular sight

I received this awesome picture in my mail. Isn't it a magnificent vision!

Whether we have to say good morning or goodnight, come to a decision after seeing this picture. I yet can't make out.

What do you all perceive it as?